DOWN and OUT!

Knock on wood, we can at last report that the tracks for our forthcoming 45 have been mixed, mastered, and delivered to the powers that be.  These two numbers were hammered out by the equally-hammered Dels on April 21, 2013, in a few stolen minutes on the eve of our King Khan & BBQ Show doubleheader, with typically no rehearsal, preparation, or planning; accordingly, you can expect our customary shaggy blend of creakiness, chaos, and carnage.  The topside teaches teens and tipplers that sweaty new dance sensation sweeping the Southeast, "The Scrump", while the flipper flings ya down the gutter in a stagger of shame as "The Worm Whispers".  Lookin' toward a Xmas release on this spinneroo, courtesy of Baltimore's esteemed Hidden Volume Stereo Sounds label -- stay tooned!

ho hum...

Yeah, yeah, I know, it's like the world screeched to a halt once Winthrop birthed his baby... Gimme a break, we're old men, and there's not a lotta mischief ya can get in when the band's spread out over 500 miles or so.  No solid, confirmed gigs till November, but we all know that can change on a dime.  Our forthcoming 45 on Baltimore's Hidden Volume label is coming along, with the latest mix awaiting approval from the top brass and the artwork receiving its final brushstrokes as we speak -- shootin' for a November release on this, fingers crossed and presses willing.  Song titles still pending, as in, we haven't named 'em yet.  Lay off, we're not that kinda band...

Anyway, no nooz is good nooz, right?

DELUSIONHEIR!!!

Kudos & Kongrats to our virile skinsmith Winthrop and his lovelier half Julie on the timely arrival of Official Junior Del, Simon Carter, yesterday morning!  Welcome to the fold, fella!

DELUSIONAIREWEAR!

Provided the Florida contingent of the Dels remembers to toss 'em in the truck, and provided we don't forget 'em at the house as we leave for the gigs, the Delusionaires are gonna be stockin' an honest-to-Allah merch table's worth o' dry goods at the aforementioned two shows.  In addition to our still-steamin'-fresh LP FLOOZE PARTY (vinyl-only, kids, but it comes with a free mp3 download, so quit yer whinin' and think of it as art), plus a limited number of the DESTINATION POON reissue (CD-only, 'cause $$) and the BEAVERAMA SUPER COLOR FUN ACTIVITY BOOK (complete with crayons while supplies last!), we're hawkin' some hot-offa-the-grill bling, swag, and stitchery!  Our first-ever pinback buttons (YOU try fittin' a 12-letter name across an inch & a half, smartass...), some novelty ceramic coasters grudgingly handcrafted in the catacombs of Mondello Manor, and our first line of shirts in over a decade!  All priced to move, and quick, so show up early with a coupla fins & sawbucks and help ensure we ain't stranded in the city where you hafta live!

WHEN KHANS KOLLIDE!!!

Yes, friends, there ain't no mistruth about it -- the diametrically dysfunctional Delusionaires are embarking on a two-day micro-tour of the sweet, sultry South with our Canadian-German brethren THE KING KHAN AND BBQ SHOW!  Third week of April, two shows only!  Monday, April 22nd, ya can catch this mess in our semi-hometown (well, for Artie, that is) of Atlanta, GA, at The Basement in East Atlanta Village. Here's a  visual aid in that regard...

... and the next night, we're takin' this chaos on the road to the sweatier, more seductive shadows of Siberia, in the noblest nooks of New Orleans, LA!  To wit:

Ya can skip one, or ya can skip the other, but ya ain't gonna wanna skip 'em both -- these two gigs are the only two Southeastern shows for the King Khan & BBQ Show this tour, and they're not exactly the easiest act to catch these days!  On top o' that, wily young Winthrop's expecting a new little Delusionheir within days of these dates, so that's gonna necessarily knock the Dels outa the danceterias for a good while.  Dig 'em while ya can, doggies!

WEBFULL O' WAX

I'm man enough to admit that sales of our new LP FLOOZE PARTY have dropped precipitously since its release in mid-January, but ya can't say we haven't tried.  Well, actually, you can say that, 'cause we haven't!  There's been no shows since the release party (where, it must be said, we sold a veritable shit-ton o' spinners -- thank you, Orlando!), and the pleasures of promotion & distribution are best enjoyed by men less aged and cavalier than we. In short, we haven't done squat to try to move this mother.

Good nooz is, a coupla far cooler cats have taken up the challenge, so if yer one of the desolate few not to have scored this slithering spinner, yer in luck!  We're proud and pleased to report that you can score the monumental mayhem of FLOOZE PARTY with a coupla quick clicks at Go Zombie! Records (where ya can also snag a CD copy of the Dels' first longplayer, 2003's monolithic DESTINATION POON, while supplies last!) or, in a palm-sweatingly palpitating development, from the legendary Norton Records, in whose company (smack dab between the Dictators and the Black Lips!) we find ourselves dizzyingly honored, humbled, and bewildered.  Either way, yer a winner -- give 'em a click and a spin!

And finally, for those of ya preferring a more personal shopping experience, we are proud to boast that you can pick up our little wax aphrodisiac in person at the incredible Psychotronic Store at 859 1/2 Broad Street in Augusta, GA (Map), worth a trip from anywhere in this great nation.  Set aside the better part of yer day, 'cause it's only the pleading eyes of yer spouse that's gonna pull ya away from this titillating trove of treasures.  Finer company we could not keep!

FLYERAMA, PT. 3: HERE & THERE

...and here we have miscellaneous old flyers tossed together back in the day.  Self-explanatory...